After two years of working his jazzy socks off as a teacher, Ted has set off around the world for a year, with the advance warning that he ‘won’t even be back for Christmas drinks’. We floated a few ideas for a leaving do last week, some of which were fraudulently fancy; saying goodbye to Ted in a smart London cocktail bar would be like throwing the Sultan of Brunei a birthday party at Pizza Hut. In the end we decided to do something traditionally Ted and spend his last evening playing flip cup at Kenny’s house. Continue reading Flip Cup
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September 1, 2010 | Flip CupAugust 27, 2010 | Long Lost Friend
August 26, 2010 | Old Flame
‘Oooh, what? Is it cake?’ ‘No’ ‘Chocolate cake?’ ‘No’ ‘A secret tunnel leading from our flat to a cake factory?’ ‘No. Come upstairs’ Continue reading Old Flame August 24, 2010 | The Wedding
I’m not generally scared of flying, but those little propellor planes freak me out. I like my planes big and butch, ideally accessed through a nice, carpeted umbilical cord walkway so you forget you’re even on a plane, and then someone serves you nuts and you feel a smooth pulling sensation as it takes off, you read a chapter of Joan Collins and drift off to sleep. Continue reading The Wedding August 19, 2010 | Isle of Man
In my version of their youth, they used to skip around holding hands singing Ellan Vannin, making necklaces of seaweed and eating raw turnips and seal steaks. Sam’s family are even in the Visit Isle of Man advert, which I had the pleasure of viewing one afternoon on BBC 2 when I was off sick from work, and features her curly-haired cousins frolicking on a pebble beach and leading horses through a woodland glen. Given Sam and Rob’s combined grab bag of favourable genes (great skin, long legs and lashes, shiny hair, good bone structure) I imagine they’ll eventually be selected to star with their own apple-cheeked Isle of Man kiddies in future versions to come. Continue reading Isle of Man August 16, 2010 | Margarita Loca
No Sex Quarterly Measuring System Q1 = 0-3 months = dating Dave met a girl online last Wednesday, took her for a drink on Thursday, they met for dinner on Friday, breakfast on Saturday and then, in the words of Craig David, were chilled on Sunday. Or they would have been if Dave hadn’t got bored and ended it on Saturday – by text. Easy come, easy go. Single again, he joined us for Sunday lunch at a Mexican restaurant called Margarita Loca in Battersea, a place where no-one should go to sober: Continue reading Margarita Loca August 15, 2010 | Artistic Differences
August 10, 2010 | Hen
August 6, 2010 | House Party
One of the hosts – Kenny – was circling the kitchen, clutching his guitar, eyes rolled back in his head like an extra from Shaun of the Dead. A couple of pretty girls were sitting on the table watching him intently. He’s good looking, Kenny, in that sort of louche way that makes women think he needs rescuing. The other host appeared to be missing: Continue reading House Party July 29, 2010 | How do you know this person?Remember the early days of Facebook, before it became the controversy-courting internet behemoth it is today, and was just a university network where students could post up photos of each other in fancy dress. Back then being ‘married’ or ‘engaged’ was meant ironically, and the most inflammatory group was ‘Don’t Close The Boat’ (368 members), in support of the infamous Newcastle club that smelt of sick and had a revolving dance floor. Continue reading How do you know this person? |
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What They Have to Say About The Girl